In the Name of Concern?

"Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts." Psalm 139:23 (NIV)


We recently had an incident in our neighborhood where a residents home was raided on charges of child pornography. This is the home with four children under the age of ten, so needless to say, we've all as neighbors been quite concerned. As to be expected, word has spread like fire from neighbor to neighbor like a game of Telephone. You can't seem to escape the constant chatter.

While talking to a close friend and neighbor about the incident, her words were striking to me. While she also had the same concerns that everyone has right now, she flatly stated that what we're really doing is gossiping. Ouch! How convicting and how true!

So that got me wondering, "How many times have I disguised gossip in the name of concern?" 


Unfortunately, I believe that Christians are some of the worst offenders when it comes to this topic. What seems like harmless talk of a sister in need can quickly spiral into full-on gossip. In all fairness, I don't think (in most instances, that is) that we set out to gossip. But if we're not careful to guard our hearts, how rapidly an otherwise benign conversation can turn into our own sin.

So how do we keep our hearts in check when it comes to gossip? We do what David did in Psalm 139:23 and do a daily heart-check with God. We allow Him to test us in order that we can see where we've allowed the gaps where the enemy can get inside.

I've yet to meet anyone who really likes tests. Even the best students get nervous at the prospect of a test. Medical tests can be painful and uncomfortable. But the bottom line is that tests always serve a purpose. They allow us to see our knowledge (or lack there of). They reveal a medical condition. Tests bring results. So while tests are not fun, they are necessary to learn, grow and for the good of our overall health. We must be willing to allow God to know and test our hearts.

For me personally, it's very important that I set guidelines for myself in order to keep my heart in check. If I find myself getting drawn into a conversation about someone else, I need to stop and ask myself, "What is the reason and motive behind this conversation?"
"Is this edifying in building someone up, or am I tearing someone down?"
"Is this something that I would say if the person were standing in front of me?"
"Is this really any of my business?"

I also have to remind myself that even saying nothing at all yet still listening is also taking part in gossip.

I've learned the hard way just how damaging gossip can be. I've been on both sides of gossip, as the gossiper and the gossipee, and both don't feel good and are incredibly damaging to a person's spirit. God has convicted me more than I'd like to admit about gossip and yet, If I'm not careful, I can easily find myself in the midst of gossip.

Lord, today I invite you to search my heart and test me when it comes to gossip. Help me to guard my heart and consider my motives when I speak of others. Amen