With a Grateful Heart

"Be cheerful no matter what; pray all the time; thank God no matter what happens. This is the way that God wants you who belong to Christ Jesus to live." (Thessalonians 5:16-18 - The Message)

As a parent, helping your child to develop a grateful heart is a challenge. It's more than just getting them to say thank you after they receive a gift. I'm talking about a heart that is thankful in all circumstances, no matter what they have or what they don't have.

Of course, this is one of those lessons that is best learned by example. So if I want to teach Mason to be grateful, I need to search my own heart to see if I am being thankful in all circumstances, no matter what I have or don't have. Ouch! Talk about a heart-check! How many times in a day do I think to myself, "Gee, I wish I had that instead of what I have." How often do I compare what I have to someone else? How often do I covet someone else's situation or relationship or things? The short answer: too often.

Mason's getting to the age where he understands that items have a monetary value. He sees Bob and I pay for things and he recognizes that when I give someone cash or use my debit card, I can walk out of the store with what's in my cart. But how do I get him to understand that what we have is not who we are?

Everything in our home and in the life of our family begins with God. It's God's home. It's God's car. It's God's money. And when we talk about how everything we have is God's, we also make sure that Mason knows that we don't deserve anything that we have; everything is a gift. Everything we have is a gift from God. We also need him to know (while we're constantly reminding ourselves) that we need to be grateful for every gift that God has given us. Because as quickly as He can bless us, just as quickly it can be gone. But if we place our worth in Jesus and not stuff or to what happens to us, we won't be let down and it can never be taken away from us.

I'm always shocked at how people actually attach their self-worth to things or to circumstances. A home. A car. A job. Health. Or even a person. I'm not saying that these things aren't important at all or that we're selfish to care about them. We're actually commanded to be good stewards of the gifts that God gives us. But I am saying that putting all of our trust in these things will fail us every time. Because what happens when one or more of them fails? What if we lose a job and then we lose our home? What if a child dies or a spouse gets sick? If we've put everything in those people or circumstances or things and it all falls apart? Then what?

And then in turn, what are we teaching our children if we show them that things or circumstances are all that matter? When we put the ultimate value on stuff, we are teaching our children that when they receive things, then they are loved. When they get gifts, then they are valued. And if we tell them what it costs or the monetary value of the gift, then we are attaching a price to their self-worth. What a sad, irresponsible lesson I would be teaching Mason if I did this. I can't even begin to imagine the joy I'd be stealing from him if I taught him that there was a price-tag attached to his self-worth.

I love that Mason thinks it's a big deal to get a quarter for the bubble-gum machine at the mall. I love that a $20 bill is like hitting the mother-load. It's my job to continue to teach him to be grateful in all things. It's my responsibility to be continually thankful to God for the countless ways that He's blessed, and continues to bless, our family. It's then our job to bless other's back.

In order for Mason to learn to be grateful, he not only needs to see that Bob and I are living grateful lives, but that we are blessing others with the blessings of God. I think that's actually the key to this lesson. Mason needs to know that momma and daddy tithe. He needs to understand that we give each month to our precious African son and brother, Darius, through World Vision. Mason needs to know that his parents volunteer on a regular basis to ministry opportunities. Mason needs to see thanksgiving and love in action.

Now before you think you see a halo around our family, let me stop you right there. We are so far from hitting the mark on a regular basis. We strive and fail. But we keep striving and rely on the love and hope  of Jesus to keep us going. It's a process, and I'm so "grateful" for God's grace.